‘My daughter was taken by Hamas. My Irish friends have gone quiet’

It is three years since Emily Hand, then aged eight, was snatched by Hamas during its terrorist attack on Israel that left more than 1,000 dead, and her father has said they never speak about the atrocity that has scarred their lives. Dublin-born Thomas Hand was initially told his daughter had been killed during the attacks on October 7, 2023. At the time he spoke of his relief, believing her fate would have been much worse had she been taken to Gaza. But he was then told she had been kidnapped while attending a sleepover at a friend’s home in Kibbutz Be’eri. Most commented 1 Flydubai co-pilot ‘used axe in attempted terrorist attack’ Middle East 718 comments 2 Ukraine braces for deep freeze in Putin’s worst winter blitz yet Russia-Ukraine war 255 comments 3 Free care is already available. But why is it so hard to get? Family Finances 58 comments 4 Sean Dyche: My plasterer mate thinks he knows more about tactics than me Football 40 comments 5 This foundation is the best I’ve used in years Beauty 14 comments Emily, who is now 11, was held for 50 days before eventually being released as part of a truce deal. As the grim anniversary that marks the darkest of days for Emily and her father approaches, he gave a rare insight into his daughter’s recovery. The moment when Emily Hand was reunited with her father in November 2023 ISRAEL ARMY/AFP/GETTY IMAGES “We don’t talk about it at all. Rarely she will come out with something that surprises me that she hasn’t said in the past but no, we don’t dwell on it,” he said. “I guess it’s the Israeli way. You just get on with life. You can’t dwell, you have to just move on.” Top stories 1 Exclusive Kim Kardashian: ‘I was single for five years. I needed to heal’ Celebrity 2 Meet the season’s hottest skirt — the ‘Frankenkilt’ Fashion 3 Why this storied Venice hotel is a hard-to-beat literary stay Venice 4 The best luxury gadgets to buy now LUXX 5 The 16 best luxury fragrances for autumn LUXX Hand, who was born in Dun Laoghaire, south Dublin, said that the trauma his daughter experienced during her abduction occasionally manifested in the “odd flash of fear”. Advertisement “We get lots of funny noises here, like jets going over. She might jump more than anyone else would,” he said. Top stories 1 Six thrilling Costa Rica trips with Times Holidays Promoted content There has been progress too. “Only very recently, she will come back home alone from her friends without me having to go out and meet her.” And after initially clinging to her father, he says, she is now able to sleep unaccompanied in her bedroom. “For me it’s amazing as well because I get a good night’s sleep instead of being punched all night.” Hand said he and his daughter were now living like “refugees” because he was still wary of returning to their home in the area that was targeted in the attacks. “We don’t live in Kibbutz Be’eri for now. We are hoping to go back maybe next year,” he said. Emily in front of a poster bearing her image DAN CHARITY “There are still about maybe a hundred people that stayed on or went back after it was clear. People, obviously, without young kids. You know, adults, maybe even pensioners, people who are just happy in themselves to be there. But most of us with young kids, we didn’t want to risk going back there until it is absolutely safe.” Advertisement Hand said that while he still viewed himself as an Irishman and truly loved the country, he had been left “very disappointed” by the land of his birth. He said that despite the enormity of the shadow cast over people’s lives by the events of October 7 , he believed the Hamas attacks had not had a lasting impact on public consciousness in Ireland. “That was forgotten within two days. My daughter was kidnapped for 50 days. My ex-wife, who is the mother of my two older kids, was killed. Shot in the stomach, shot in the neck. I have a hundred people that I know that were murdered that day. I have 30 friends and people that I know that were kidnapped that day. “But within a few days, yes, we got instant sympathy and shock, shock, horror. But since, before we even went into Gaza, before we retaliated, there were already protests. It’s unbelievable. I don’t believe it.” The London exhibition that October 7 families want you to see Hand had moved as a volunteer to Israel and was assigned to Kibbutz Be’eri at the age of 32 after his family moved from Dublin to England when he was a child. He said he had received no contact from old friends from Ireland or any Irish politicians since the attacks, nor had he received any messages of support. Advertisement “Silence. Even my friends on Facebook that I used to have. They don’t say anything negative but also they don’t say anything positive. There’s only one or two that would. Mainly, they’re also afraid.” Hand was also critical of the furore that has erupted around Ireland’s Uefa Nations League football matches against Israel, where a high-profile Stop the Game campaign attempted to have the matches called off. An open letter was sent to Heimir Hallgrímsson , the Republic of Ireland manager, and his squad, asking them to not to participate. The Football Association of Ireland moved the home fixture to Serbia amid fan protests. The Ireland goalkeeper Gavin Bazunu opted out of the squad for the games, while the remaining players voted to play but lowered their heads during the Israeli anthem and wore black armbands in last week’s 3-0 victory. They are due to play again on Sunday. Protesters called on the FAI to boycott a fixture against Israel CILLIAN SHERLOCK/PA “It’s a sport,” Hand said. “I’ve always believed art, sport and music should be what they are. There should be no crossover into politics. Play the game, shake hands. It’s a sport. Be sporting. Be a sportsman. That wasn’t sporting, was it? I love football. Of course I watched it. Ireland thrashed us.” He said his daughter, who turned nine while in captivity, was doing her best to get back to normal life and enjoy school. Advertisement “Emily’s doing great. Normal, like a normal everyday kid. She’s recovered very well, thank God,” Hand said from Israel. “On Sunday she will be going back to school. Everything’s absolutely normal. She is very well adjusted, very sociable. Not dancing so much. Where we are, there’s not the opportunity. Another kibbutz has taken us on and made a very big space for us, which is amazing. But yeah, she still goes horse riding and all sorts of stuff.” While he believes many have forgotten the Hamas attacks, Hand says seeing close friends who were taken captive and later released in an emaciated and traumatised state is never far from his mind. He added that he now felt unsafe to travel anywhere outside of Israel. “If somebody knew who I was, I would definitely feel unsafe. I’m a victim. Let’s say me and Emily, my family, everyone here anyway, is a victim. I would still be afraid of someone recognising me abroad, or Emily. We could be attacked.” He said this made him “very, very sad” and he felt that, despite the October 7 attacks, Israel was the place where he felt safest. Advertisement “If I want to go on a holiday abroad anywhere, I have to investigate, I have to do my investigations and see what the feeling of each and every country [is]. You can’t just go, ‘Ooh, I’m going to Spain. I’m going here or there.’ You have to weigh up the risks. Nobody else has to do that.”